Survive or Thrive
The title gives the impression that one of those things is bad. Like one makes us less saved or less in love with Jesus than the other. That’s not the case. Survival is a season that we go through many times in life. Thriving is what our life should be like the rest of the time. If we didn’t have survival instincts or survival mode to fall into, then many of us would be insane or even dead. If the Lord hadn’t provided that place where we could “just get through the day” then some of us would not be here today.
There was a period of a few years, when drugs invaded our home and stripped us of everything, including running water and electricity. We were eating from soup kitchens and food pantries. We lost our home and had to intrude on others for shelter. We saw family and friends turn their backs on us. There was no money coming in. All we could do in that season was survive. It was day to day living.
There are people in this room who are dealing with the loss of children or spouses or parents. Your grief makes it impossible right now for you to thrive. You are surviving. Holding on the best way you can.
1 Kings 17:2-6 tells us that the Lord told Elijah to go and hide in the Kerith Valley and he would take care of him there. And He did. He provided water and sent Ravens to bring him food. It’s not Olive Garden, but the Lord provided a place for Elijah to “survive” until it was time for him to thrive again.
The Lord send David to the Cave of Adullam to hide out from Saul; to survive.
Survival is good, and it’s necessary for a season. If you are in survival mode today, and that is where you need to be for right now, then hopefully, you will read something today that will help you when this season of survival is over. If you are in survival mode today, and you know that season needs to end, then I pray Holy Spirit reveals to you today your way out.
Let me say this before I continue. If you are a Christian in survival mode, then, you are a Christian in survival mode. You are still saved. You may or may not feel close to Him, but He’s there, (pointing at your heart), He’s here. You may be angry with Him or disappointed; He can handle it. He will never leave you or forsake you; He is never very far from you.
Some of us are in survival mode out of habit. Probably most of us fall into that category. We are alive, but not really living. We go from day to day to day just trying to make it. We get up, we go through life, we embrace sleep like it’s our savior. Or, we try to get everything done today because tomorrow, I’m going to start living. Then tomorrow comes, and we repeat the cycle. We are alive, we are functioning, but not thriving.
DO SOME OF THESE THINGS SOUND FAMILIAR? (Mark Hall)
If I can just get to this weekend…
If I can just make it to the first of this month…
If I can just get to summer vacation…
If I can just finish this project…
If I can just beat this sickness…
If I can just make this payment…
If I can just get the kids through college…
Sound familiar? That’s what survival mode looks like. We live for some future time of peace and enjoyment and forget about the time in between. We concentrate on the finish line, but not the journey to the finish line. We need to ask ourselves, are we in survival mode? Some Christians live just to get to heaven. They survive the years of their life, but they never thrive. They die in survival mode. Survival is a season, it’s not supposed to be a lifestyle.
SO, WHAT DOES THRIVE MEAN?
According to Webster’s Revised Unabridged Dictionary, to thrive is to prosper, to increase, to succeed, to grow, to flourish. None of this happens without effort. You prosper by being industrious, you increase with good management. You grow vigorously. You also have to be in a good place to thrive: planted in good soil and eating in rich pastures.
Webster’s gave another definition which I found interesting. Thrive isn’t just a verb or an adjective, it is also a noun. It is the additional thickness of canvas or cloth around a buttonhole. I asked myself, why would that area need to be thicker? The answer was simple: so the hole didn’t get bigger than it was supposed to and become misshaped. If that happened, the button would no longer be secure in the hole. Now, we are all women here. We’ve all had those shirts where the button just wouldn’t stay in the hole, and we look down, and all our upper business is showing. The thrive, that additional thickness and strength, is what keeps things in place and connected.
In the Hebrew, the word thrive means to flourish again, to revive. So to me, that says that thriving is moving from survival mode; it is being revived. You are once again bearing fruit. You are alive again. Your season of survival, of mourning or disappointment, or anger at God is over and life is happening again. The Hebrew gives hope to those in survival mode and those trying to come out. There is hope. There is life. You will flourish again. You will live again.
In the Greek, thrive means to advance or prosper. There is movement and there is fruit. You are moving forward and increasing.
So, to live a life of thriving, means to live surrounded by strength so that you stay connected and in place, fulfilling your purpose, and adding support to the Body as a whole. Thriving is to live being planted on good ground and grazing and drinking from good pasture and water. It’s making an effort to live life to its fullest and not just waiting for life to happen.
Let me give you some pictures from scripture of what thriving looks like:
Psalm 1: “The ones who follow God will have overflowing joy. They will be standing firm like a flourishing tree planted by God’s design, deeply rooted by the brooks of bliss, bearing fruit in every season of their lives. They who are never dry, never fainting, ever blessed, ever plentiful. What indescribable joy! The Lord watches over all their paths.” That’s the Passion Translation. The KJV says, “they shall be like a tree planted by the rivers of water that bring forth their fruit in their season.” Thriving looks like flourishing. It’s being planted on good ground; good ground has a water source. Thriving looks like fruitfulness in season.
Psalm 92: “Yes! Look how You’ve made all your lovers to flourish like palm trees! They’re all growing in victory, standing with strength. You’ve transplanted them into Your heavenly courtyard where they are thriving before You. For in Your presence they will still overflow and be anointed. Even in their old age they will stay fresh, bearing luscious fruit and abiding faithful. Listen to them! They’re still proclaiming: ‘You’re so good You’re my Beautiful Strength! You’ve never made a mistake with me!” The Passion Translation. Thriving looks like victory; it looks like standing before God. Thriving is not dependent on youthfulness.
Jeremiah 17:7-8: “But blessed is the man who trusts God, the woman who sticks with God. They are like trees replanted in Eden, putting down roots near the rivers, never a worry through the hottest of summers, never dropping a leaf, serene and calm through droughts, bearing fresh fruit every season.” MSG. Thriving isn’t dependent upon the atmosphere you are in. As long as you are planted in good soil, the heat and even the lack of rain, can’t stop you from increasing, flourishing, or walking in victory.
2 Samuel 22:29-46: “Suddenly, God, your light floods my path, God drives out the darkness. I smash the bands of marauders; I vault the high fences. What a God! His road stretches straight and smooth. Every God direction is road tested. Everyone who runs toward Him makes it. Is not this the God who armed me well, then aimed me in the right direction? Now I run like a deer; I’m king of the mountain. You protect me with salvation armor; you touch me and I feel ten feet tall. You cleared the ground under me so my footing was firm.” MSG. Thriving makes you look like an Olympic athlete, even if you struggle in the natural with physical activity. It makes you a soldier, even if in the natural you can’t fight. I LOVE THIS PART: Is not this the God who armed me well, then aimed me in the right direction? It’s like we are a nuclear war head, armed and ready, and when the button is pushed, we go exactly where we are supposed to go bringing destruction upon our enemies. That’s thriving!
John 10:10: “I came that they may have and enjoy life, and have it in abundance (to the full, till it overflows).” Amplified Thriving isn’t boring.
Philippians 4:11-13: “Not that I speak from [any personal] need, for I have learned to be content [and self-sufficient through Christ, satisfied to the point where I am not disturbed or uneasy] regardless of my circumstances. I know how to get along and live humbly [in difficult times], and I also know how to enjoy abundance and live in prosperity. In any and every circumstance I have learned the secret [of facing life], whether well-fed or going hungry, whether having an abundance or being in need. I can do all things [which He has called me to do] through Him who strengthens and empowers me [to fulfill His purpose—I am self- sufficient in Christ’s sufficiency; I am ready for anything and equal to anything through Him who infuses me with inner strength and confident peace.]” Amplified Thriving isn’t seeing life thru Rose colored glasses. It isn’t denying that we will experience the storms of life. It’s looking those storms in the face and saying, “I am self sufficient through Christ, and I am empowered by Him to fulfill His purpose no matter what!” People who thrive are not defeated by difficulties because through Him they know that they are ready for anything and equal to anything, and they have peace while going through.
How do we get to that? How do we live how scriptures say we should be living? How does our life mirror what scripture says thriving should look like? There are probably lots of answers in scripture, but the one I want to concentrate on today is what the Lord has been working in me the last five years or so. (imagine 4 ladies in a circle holding hands with you as the 5th in the middle)
Now think about the word thrive, the noun: the thickness to the piece of cloth or canvas that strengthens the button hole. You are the button.
They are the thrive. They keep you in place. They keep you connected to the shirt, doing their part to keep the shirt as a whole in good condition.
They are your sisters. Some of them you get along better with than others. But they all serve a purpose in your life.
They help you thrive. They support you when you need to be in survival mode, but they remind you, sometimes not so gently, that life goes on and you need to be living it.
They help you flourish again. They revive you. They remind you that you’re planted in good soil and that you need to graze on some good pasture in order to renew your strength.
They remind you that it takes effort to prosper and good management to increase.
Some of them are watching you, and some of them are keeping watch. We thrive when we have support and protection; watching you and watching out for you.
Thriving comes with having a community of people surrounding you. Sometimes you will be the button, and sometimes, you will be the thrive, but together, you stay connected and in place.
We thrive from community. You can survive alone; some of us have to. You can’t thrive alone.
SEVEN HABITS OF PEOPLE WHO THRIVE: (Frank Damazio)
Eat the Word of God.
Be strong in prayer.
Purify the soul (WORSHIP)
Love like Jesus.
Forgive daily.
Learn to give
Build relationships (community)
What spoke to me after reading this list, is that it’s our community that will encourage us to walk faithfully in the other six habits. My pastor has a discipleship method that he would like us to use in our Small Groups. Part of that discipleship method deals with us asking each other a series of open ended questions. If we are not eating the Word, praying, worshipping, loving like Jesus, and walking in forgiveness, the people you are connected with will see it. It will show up in your small group, with your community, in your discipling relationship. Your sisters will see it, and if you are truly walking in love with one another, they will lovingly help you see where you are falling short and lovingly help you get to the point where you are thriving in that area again. You can get away with not doing those things if there is no one in your life to disciple you or hold you accountable.
You can stay in survival mode when the season has ended. It becomes easier and easier to drown out Holy Spirit’s voice when there are no sisters around you echoing that voice, but, when I am echoing that voice and the other six or seven women in your community are doing the same, you start to hear. When you have people in your life who are truly your thrive (the noun), helping you to stay connected to the Body and doing your part to support it, then you can truly thrive (the verb): revive, flourish again, prosper, advance, grow, increase, and succeed.
YOU MAY BE ASKING, IS COMMUNITY REALLY THAT IMPORTANT? LET’S SEE WHAT SCRIPTURE SAYS:
Psalm 133:1-3: “Behold, how good and pleasant it is when brothers dwell in unity! 2 It is like the precious oil on the head, running down on the beard, on the beard of Aaron, running down on the collar of his robes! 3 It is like the dew of Hermon, which falls on the mountains of Zion! For there the Lord has commanded the blessing, life forevermore.”
The Matthew Henry Commentary says, “This is commendable: — brethren’s dwelling together in unity, not quarreling and devouring one another, but delighting in each other with mutual endearments, and promoting each other’s welfare with mutual services. Goodness and pleasantness come from us dwelling in unity, to dwell even as one, having one heart, one soul, one interest.”
This ointment was holy. So must our brotherly love be, with a pure heart, devoted to God. We must love those that are begotten for His sake. Aaron and his sons were not admitted to minister unto the Lord till they were anointed with this ointment, nor are our services acceptable to God without this holy love; if we don’t have that, we have nothing.
It’s there, in that place where we dwell in unity, in community, that the Lord commands the blessing. The blessing which God commands on those that dwell in love is life for evermore. Those that dwell in love not only dwell in God, but do already dwell in heaven. Life comes from community!
2 Thess 1:1-12: “1 Paul, Silvanus, and Timothy, To the church of the Thessalonians in God our Father and the Lord Jesus Christ: 2 Grace to you and peace from God our Father and the Lord Jesus Christ. 3 We ought always to give thanks to God for you, brothers, as is right, because your faith is growing abundantly, and the love of every one of you for one another is increasing.
Why do Paul, Silvanus, and Timothy give thanks to God always? Because their faith is growing AND because their love for one another is increasing. You can’t love someone unless you are in community with them because it’s intimacy that allows us to grow in love. So in essence, Paul, Silvanus, and Timothy gave continual thanks to God because the people in Thessalonica were in community with one another. Paul saw the importance of community and gave thanks to God for it.
Phil 1:27, 2:2: “27 Only let your manner of life be worthy of the gospel of Christ, so that whether I come and see you or am absent, I may hear of you that you are standing firm in one spirit, with one mind striving side by side for the faith of the gospel.” “2 complete my joy by being of the same mind, having the same love, being in full accord and of one mind.”
What manner of life makes us worthy of the Gospel of Christ? A life lived in Community! Or as Paul says, standing firm in ONE spirit, with ONE mind, having the same love, and striving side by side for the faith of the gospel.
Romans 12:4-5,16, 14:1, 19: “4 For as in one body we have many members, and the members do not all have the same function, 5 so we, though many, are one body in Christ, and individually members one of another.” “16 Live in harmony with one another. Do not be haughty, but associate with the lowly. Never be wise in your own sight.” “14 As for the one who is weak in faith, welcome him, but not to quarrel over opinions.” “19 So then let us pursue what makes for peace and for mutual up building.”
If someone is not like you, so what. Humble yourself. They still may be meant to be in community with you. We can all learn from one another.
Hebrews 10:24-25: “24 And let us consider how to stir up one another to love and good works, 25 not neglecting to meet together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another, and all the more as you see the Day drawing near.”
If tomorrow, America became a country without religious freedom, and church was outlawed, do you have a support system of sisters in place where you can call each other and visit one another’s homes and receive the strength and power that comes from community? Or, will you be alone and lost? We are called to stir one another up to love and good works, in community.
YOU MAY BE ASKING, IS COMMUNITY REALLY THAT POWERFUL? LET’S SEE WHAT SCRIPTURE SAYS:
Go to Genesis 11:1-8: “1 And the whole earth was of one language, and of one speech. 2 And it came to pass, as they journeyed from the east, that they found a plain in the land of Shinar; and they dwelt there. 3 And they said one to another, Go to, let us make brick, and burn them thoroughly. And they had brick for stone, and slime had they for mortar. 4 And they said, Go to, let us build us a city and a tower, whose top may reach unto heaven; and let us make us a name, lest we be scattered abroad upon the face of the whole earth. 5 And the LORD came down to see the city and the tower, which the children of men builded. 6 And the LORD said, Behold, the people is one, and they have all one language; and this they begin to do: and now nothing will be restrained from them, which they have imagined to do. 7 Go to, let us go down, and there confound their language, that they may not understand one another's speech. 8 So the LORD scattered them abroad from thence upon the face of all the earth: and they left off to build the city.”
The people were one, they spoke the same language, they walked in the same purpose. God said in verse 6 that because of this, NOTHING will be restrained from them. The Complete Jewish Bible says it this way, “At this rate, nothing they set out to accomplish will be impossible for them!” It takes an act of God to stop the things we can do when we work as ONE. Only God can stop us when we work together. That’s how strong, that’s how powerful community is. When we get together and function as ONE, only God can stop us, and because we are working in tune, not just with each other, but with Holy Spirit, He won’t stop us.
Nothing will be restrained from us if we come together. Nothing we set out to accomplish together will be impossible for us. This should excite us! This should make us run to each other. The impossible is possible if we work together toward the same purpose.
As great as all that is, we have to remember that community means people. Human beings; redeemed human beings who have yet to become all that we will become. So, we are flawed, easily frustrated and aggravated with one another, judgmental, opinionated, etc. etc. Sometimes we are just plain mean to one another. Sometimes, we are so caught up in our own worlds, we live like we don’t care about anyone else’s. We can be insensitive and lacking sympathy. Where you have people, sometimes you have a mess. So, we know that community is important, powerful, necessary, and beautiful, but IS COMMUNITY WORTH IT?
Proverbs 14:4 says, “Where no oxen are, the crib is clean, but much increase is by the strength of the ox.”
This verse deals with two types of people, farmers. The farmer who has oxen and the farmer who doesn’t. The farmer who has oxen has to clean up the mess that all animals make. The “crib” as this verse calls it, or the stall, a more familiar term, gets dirty when animals are in it. Not to be too graphic, but they eat and they release. The farmer with no oxen has a clean stall, no mess. If we are just looking at the mess that needs to be cleaned up, then the farmer with no oxen is the smart one. But, outside of the mess, what kind of life will he have?
No oxen means he does all the work on the farm himself
No oxen means he does less work because he has no help
No oxen means less food planted and harvested
No oxen means he has enough for himself and his family, but nothing to put in store; no legacy to leave behind for his family
No oxen means his body is broken down faster from doing all the work himself
No oxen means his family sees him less because he has to work longer
Now, let’s look at the life of the farmer with the oxen.
The animals do the heavy lifting and pulling.
More work gets done.
More food planted and harvested.
He has enough for himself, his family, his store house, and enough to sell at a profit to build a legacy to leave behind for his family.
His is healthier because he is doing the work of a man and not an animal.
He can spend more time with his family.
When you look at the benefits of having the oxen, it outweighs the inconvenient messes he has to clean up. The farmer with the oxen is more blessed.
The farmer with the oxen is the Christian living in community. Yes, there is mess that will need to be cleaned up, but the result is a thriving life.
The farmer with no oxen is the Christian doing life alone. They don’t have to deal with the mess of human companionship, but they also don’t reap the rewards of community.
WHAT ARE SOME ARGUMENTS REGARDING COMMUNITY?
I don’t have time for community. MAKE TIME
I don’t get along with women; I’ve always gotten along better with men.CHANGE
The people at my church just aren’t friendly. BE BRAVE. INVITE SOMEONETO LUNCH. IF THEY SAY NO, FIND SOMEONE ELSE. I’ve tried. TRY AGAIN.
I’ve got a close family; they are my community. DON’T BE SELFISH. WHAT ABOUT THE WOMEN WHO DON’T HAVE FAMILY?
I already have a group of women that I’m connected to. FIND ONE MORE. THERE ARE LOTS OF WOMEN IN THIS CHURCH DOING LIFE ALONE, AND THEIR LIVES CAN BE CHANGED FOR THE BETTER IF YOU INCLUDE THEM IN YOUR GROUP.
I’m here today because of community. Because one day in a membership class, my old pastor, Dr. Brian Simmons, looked at all of us and said, “you will join a small group.” I didn’t like people. I preferred my own company and that of my immediate family, but I’m a rules person, and since one of the rules for membership was small groups, I joined one. Then I ran one, and then another, and another. Then I helped run the Singles Ministry, and now I’m here in Women’s Ministry. I’m still not the most enthusiastic people person, I still LOVE my own company, but in being obedient, I discovered the absolute necessity of community.
I want every woman in here to be connected, and I’m not talking about surface connection. It’s great that you have a group of women that you sit with every Sunday, but unless they are part of your week, part of your ups and downs, people you can go to when you fall to help you get up, people you can confront and encourage, then it’s not real connection.
If your first call when you are going through something is to the church, then you are not connected. When Barbara went into the hospital, we found out from Trina, because Barbara and Trina are connected. When Linda’s husband was in the ER, I found out from Barbara, because Barbara and Linda are connected. When Sheila lost a family member recently, I found out from Tunde, because Sheila and Tunde are connected. I’m not saying that you can’t call the church and speak to your pastors if something is wrong. Please hear me. What I’m saying is that if your only connection in church is to the pastors, if they are the first and only call you make, if you don’t have sisters that know what’s going on and are praying for you, then that’s a clear indication that you need community.
Let’s look at what happened to King David. The Lord sent him to the Cave of Adullam in order to protect him from Saul. God didn’t leave him there alone. He sent David’s family plus, 1 Samuel 22:2 tells us that the Lord sent “every one that was in distress, and every one that was in debt, and every one that was discontented.” Sometimes, there will be people in your group who are in debt, distressed, and discontented. YOU MAY BE THAT PERSON. David didn’t send them away, he became their captain. Some of those men became his MIGHTY MEN. They started out as distressed, in debt, and discontented, but they became legends. That’s the power of community. Together, we have the capacity to become more than we could ever hope or imagine.