Enjoy Life to the Very Last Drop by Theresa Millet

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“Lord, I have chosen you alone as my inheritance.  You are my prize, my pleasure, and my portion.  I leave my destiny and its timing in your hands.  Your pleasant path leads me to pleasant places.  I’m overwhelmed with the privileges that come with following you for you have given me the best!“ (Psalms 16:5-6)

At this stage of my life, I’m 32 years old.  I am just shy of a year married.  I have no children.  I live in a pretty condo in New Haven, but with limited space and not in the best neighborhood.  I have a Masters degree and I’m working at Target.  My last educational experience ended 8 years ago and I’m going back to school in the Fall to pursue a degree in Marriage and Family counseling, something I’m very passionate about.

I am living in the reality of dreams I’ve had as a little girl and yet waiting for other dreams to take place.  I am looking forward to children, a home, a job working in a field I love, among other things.  Yet at this time, what I find myself focusing on and pursuing is the ability to enjoy life, as it is, right at this moment.  I want to soak in every smile, every joy, every bit of laughter and enjoyment, as well as every lesson learned.  At some point, this season will be a distant memory and I don’t want to miss anything while I’m here.

This past Christmas, I spent the evening alone in the condo with my husband.  As I stood in the kitchen making us coffee, I looked back at Him sitting at the table studying a puzzle we were working on.  I took a mental snapshot of the moment, recognizing that I don’t know when a baby will come and if this could be the last Christmas, we spend a quiet evening alone.  I cherished every bit of it.

It used to be the case that I could never truly enjoy the moment.  Somewhere in the back of my head I was always worried about the next thing that needed to be done or dwelling on something in the past.  I’ve always been self-aware and could identify issues I needed to work through and heal from.  Somehow, I believed that I could never fully relax and let go, so long as those issues were still needing work and attention.  I had the mentality that once I arrived at a place of total and complete healing, I could get on to the business of enjoying my life.  Once I had the answers and the meaning I was searching for, I could let go.  Once my dreams came true, I could fully start living.

Today, I understand that everything important in my life involves a journey and a process.  I am robbing myself if I don’t enjoy the view and the many, MANY, blessings along the road.  God is good.  He is faithful.  His mercy and kindness are always following both me and you.  I have finally understood that I’ll never arrive at a state of complete perfection.  I will always be in the place of having met some goals and having achieved some of my dreams, while waiting for others to come to pass.  There will always be moments of hardship and there will always be moments of joy, triumph and victory. 

Whatever the moment holds, I long to experience the God in it, because He is always present.  I long to hear His voice and notice His hand at work at every turn, even if the movements appear subtle at first.  I long to allow His love to wash over me and to melt my heart with every minute that passes by.  I long to pause long enough to pick up every love note He drops along my path, as we take this journey together.

I long to enjoy this life and all that it holds to the very last drop, no matter where the path takes me.